the fig tree

8 Mar

Alright so sooner or later I’m going to be making some executive decisions regarding MY ENTIRE LIFE and I’d really rather not. Too bad for me.

Here are the options:

I graduate, do my CF (clinical fellowship), and take a job (or in my case, like 90 jobs because I like variety and being an SLP means I get to do whatever I want).

OR!

I graduate, do my CF, and get my Ph.D.

What are the benefits of a Ph.D. in speech-language pathology you ask? Good question. I will tell you.

I get to do research and teach. The end. And really I could teach without my doctorate. So basically it means I get to do research. And I LIKE doing research. As such, the benefits are few but mighty.

But by next May I will have completed a, what, 20 year stint in school? I’m feeling a little antsy. Ya know? Kind of want to get my life started here. I’d like to get out into the world and figure out what setting I want to work in and settle and have babies because my biological clock is ticking and I LOVE BABIES. I’m not real interested in being a career student.

HOWEVER, the strong, independent feminist in me says, “NO! NOOO! No babies! Move away! Get your Ph.D.! Have an adventure!” Also, my mom would likely agree with this – not just my inner feminist talking here.

An adventure does have its appeal. And if I don’t do it now I probably won’t ever do it. Because babies are not conducive to adventure. Some people might consider a baby an adventure in and of itself I suppose. Anyway, I could have an adventure and that would be cool.

I also have to figure out where I’m doing my internship. I could just go straight home to the STL and snuggle up there for awhile. My friends and family are there and it would make sense that I hunker down where I have humans that like me. But the adventure side of me is saying, “NO! NOOO! Go somewhere new and exciting and meet new people and explore!” If I develop a good reason to move back to St. Louis in the next…four months I’ll let you know. I kind of have to decide what the plan is soon since I have to pick my internship sites. Also if I don’t move right back to St. Louis I could get a job anywhere, even abroad with the military. And that would be delightful!

What to do, what to do. DILEMMA.

I JUST DON’T KNOW.

But once I figure it out I’ll share. Or if anyone has any suggestions feel free to grace me with them.

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